Sexting Tips for Men

by Beste Guneysu

About the author

man using sexting tips

Hi !

My girlfriend just moved to the other side of the country and it will be a 3 h flight every time I go and visit her. The plan is to start sexting and I need sexting tips for men (I have only found tips for women so far). I’m hoping sexting will keep us excited about each other even if we are far apart.

People always claim that long-distance relationships are hard, but we are both committed to making it work. I feel pretty confident, she is only going to be away for 1 year.

Our sex life has always been really good, and since I found this website and got the Master Key, it has become even better. My girlfriend is one sexy lady. And even though we will not be able to physically touch each other as much as before, I want to keep that spark alive.

I want us to have a sex life even if we are miles away from each other. I even want to take this as an opportunity to explore some new things we haven’t tried before. I’m thinking the physical distance between us will be a way to find out more about my girlfriend’s sexuality and what she fantasizes about.

I’m a Complete Sexting Newbie

Basically, I want our sex life to continue to be hot and steamy. Over text, with the help of pictures, videos and video calls. Whatever it takes! I need sexting tips for men.

However, in the past we haven’t sent anything more sexual than “Wish you were here so I could touch you.”

I’m basically a sexting virgin so I need a step-by-step approach. I should also mention that my girlfriend is a bit shy. I don’t know how she will react.

I need to know about this thing called sexting from start to finish. What to stay away from and tips on how to do it.

Hope you can help me.

Ruben

My Answer to How To Become Better at Sexting and my Best Sexting Tips for Men

Hi Ruben!

Great questions. Sexting has become more and more popular. It’s a great way to practice all-day foreplay and get your partner turned on and longing for you.

I’m sure most of us want to improve our sexting skills, and I’m happy to help and give you my best sexting tips for men.

Why Sexting is Good

After all, a lot of our life takes place on our phones. So don’t listen to the haters. Sexting has an undeserved bad reputation. In fact, it’s fun, emotionally charged, and as you pointed out, a great way to find out what makes your partner really turned on.

If you find out more things about your partner’s fantasies, it will also be easier to deliver on those fantasies the next time you meet. In fact, sexting will make you a better lover, and everyone should be doing it.

So, don’t let all the talk about unsolicited dick pics destroy the joy of having sex in a completely new way, over your smartphone, this handy little device always by your side.

Sure, there has always been phone sex (and you should definitely try it out, when you and your girlfriend become more comfortable with expressing your sexual desires), and way back there used to be steamy love letters with attached photos. (Why not try out these as well? Imagine your girlfriend’s surprise when she gets a real letter in the mail.)

Sexting as a Way of Finding out More About Yourself

Sexting is a great way to find out more about our partner, but it’s also an equally great way to find out more about ourselves and our sexuality. By putting our fantasies into words and pictures and sometimes even memes, we are forced to reflect on what makes us excited. We have to dig within ourselves to come up with new material.

The only sexting faux pas is to send the same text over and over again. I want to fuck you right now, simply won’t cut it. (Well, more than once.) Coming up with sexy scenarios actually takes a fair amount of work. But not to worry, these sexting tips for men will take you from a sexting novice to a sexting expert in no time.

Communication of Sexual Desires

For people who don’t have a long-distance relationship, sexting is also a good way to practice communicating their sexual desires.

Sexting can include a wide variety of things. There is no exact way to sext. You and your girlfriend have to find a way that suits both of you. Basically, whatever you feel comfortable with and whatever makes you excited. Just like normal sex, what turns you on when it comes to sexting can differ between people.

How to Start

Start slowly. The charm of sexting is the slow build-up. But don’t be too shy. To be unapologetically sexual outside the bedroom can feel difficult. I know it hurts a bit to expose your sexuality in words, but it’s great practice for becoming a braver and better lover.

Try and push yourself. Try different things and see what your girlfriend responds positively to. Be brave.

Specific Sexting Tips for Men

Here are a few ways to get you started.

  • Ask your girlfriend what she would want to do if the two of you were together.
  • Ask her what she would want you to do with her. Sexting is a form of teasing. Inject humor and playfulness in your questions and in your responses.
  • Compliment her. Everyone likes a great compliment. Tell her things you like about her and things that she does that turn you on.
  • Ask her what she wants you to do to her. This is another great thing about sexting. You can easily build consent into the conversation. Just ask her about her reactions and feelings to your texts.
  • Ask her what she wants to see. This way, you don’t risk sending an unwanted dick pic, when all she wanted was some sweet admiration for her breasts.

Be Specific and Pay Attention to Details

Always keep your girlfriend in mind. The more specific you can be, the more you will be able to turn her on. The more genuine details from your sex life and from what you already know about her, the more it will hit her heart and give her a warm feeling between her legs.

Think of modern-day love letters, rather than generic texts about being horny that you found on the internet.

Remind her of times when the two of you have had really hot mind-blowing sex, and tell her exactly why you thought it was great. This way, she learns more about you and what turns you on.

Sexting is indeed a good way to explore different fantasies together.  So make sure you ask her what she fantasizes about. She might not tell you right away. The trust required to share sexual fantasies takes time to build up. Also, remember that not everyone has sexual fantasies or fantasies regarding themselves.

Tips for Sexting With Pictures

When it comes to pictures, take some clues from how women do it. When sexting, most men choose to send a well-lit (or in some cases, badly lit) picture of their erect penis. This can, for sure, be exciting, in the right context, but going for the dick pics too soon is like skipping the foreplay. (No foreplay can be exciting at certain times, but done too often, it’s just laziness.)

Instead, send different teasing and sensual pictures, without exposing everything.

Examples of this can be your hand going down your pants. Or her favorite part of you. If she likes your legs, take a picture of them. If she likes your stomach, take a picture of it before you roll out of bed in the morning. Take a picture of when you just stepped out of the shower. Take a picture when you are at the gym. Most women enjoy seeing their men working out.

This type of sensual pictures may actually take a lot of hard work. Lighting and angles have to be right for the photo to look good. And that’s probably another reason why so many men settle for dick pics, they are simply lazy. Just slam out the meat, a quick click, and they are done. Don’t be that guy.

Sexting is a Like Sending a Gift

One thing that makes sexting a bit tricky is that you don’t always get the response you were hoping for. Maybe you craft a perfect exciting story, and your girlfriend just responds with a simple “hot.”

Because it is by text, she might receive the message when she is busy. She might have important work to do or be engaged in socializing with grandpa. That’s part of the charm of sexting, but also a reason why you can’t always expect the exact response you were hoping for.

Another reason is that what turns us on sexually is different between different people, so what is exciting to you might not be equally exciting to your girlfriend.

When this happens, and it will happen, you have to remind yourself that sending a sext is like sending a gift. You have to give freely without expecting something in return.

Mix Things Up

Take advantage of the different aspects of technology. For example, you can use a voice recording one time, pictures another, and videos if you are feeling brave. Just like everything else, great sexting takes more time and creativity than you can imagine.

How to get Sexting Inspiration

If you have problems coming up with what to write, try a visualization exercise. Sit comfortably, in the dark. Take a couple of minutes and focus on your breathing. Relax and think about what you would like to do to your girlfriend.

If you still have a hard time coming up with things, think about some of the great sex the two of you have had and get your inspiration from this. What kind of surroundings are you in? A beach? A cabin in the alps?

Use all your five senses. Smell. Taste. The sensation of skin under your fingertips. To be able to evoke feelings through text, it’s important to use all our senses and thus create a multidimensional fictional world.

Switch Things Up

Do remember to switch things up. Sexting, just like normal sex, benefits from the unexpected. When you have started your texting adventure, alternate between being vague (to spark her imagination) and direct. Being direct shows her that you are comfortable with your sexuality, and that is in itself a turn-on for most women.

Remember to Have Fun

Sexting should be fun, but it can feel a bit uncomfortable in the beginning. Most of us are used to being sexual in one context (our bedrooms) and not in another (our phones). Not everyone like sexting, so have a talk with your girlfriend next time the two of you meet, explain why you want to try it, and see what she says.

However when it comes to sex, not everything is intellectual, so you can also try and test the sexting waters before you talk about it. You want to tap into her feelings and get her gut reaction, not her intellectual reaction. Just shoot her a message and see what she replies.

Hopefully, I’ve given you plenty of inspiration in the above text. Have a great time sparking your girlfriend’s sext sense ;D. Best of luck.

Olivia


How to Become Amazing in Bed

Want to know the secret of becoming amazing in bed, to give your woman the best sex she’s had in her whole life?

I’m Joe Nathan, the creator of The Pleasure Keys. Way before I started the website, I learned that sex is a skill, and just like any other skill, it can be improved to perfection.

To learn how to give your woman amazing experiences and how to fuck her like she’s never been fucked before, I recommend my ultimate guide to become an amazing lover.

Best of luck
, Joe


Share
Written by:

Beste Güneysu Şeker is an expert psychologist. She has been working with children and adults as a specialist for 5 years, both with individual therapy and online therapy processes. She holds a Master's Degree in Clinic Psychology by the Near East University and a Bachelor's Degreee in Psychology by Eastern Mediterranean University (both institutions are in Cyprus). She is based in Angora, Turkey. You can also find her on LinkedIn and Instagram


ThePleasureKeys.com site logo

The Pleasure Keys is the number one website focused on men's sexual well-being. It is founded by Joe Nathan, the author of The Master Key.

If you like our content, share it with your friends and help them get the most out of their sex life.




Related Articles

Leave a Comment