When a lot of guys think about how to finger fuck, they naturally think that you do it by moving the fingers in and out. So this is what they end up doing in bed. Stop this, guys!
I know that’s how you move your dick, so it may make all the sense in the world. But that’s how you move your dick, so if you think a bit further, it actually doesn’t make any sense at all. Your finger is much thinner than your dick. So moving it in and out like a dick, is something that most women only find annoying.
If you instead learn how to finger fuck properly, you will experience how most women react extremely well. Especially when you’re using internal techniques.
Table of Contents
- 1 So how do you finger her the right way?
- 2 Preparation for a nice finger fuck: what’s important?
- 3 During the finger fuck: what works the best?
- 4 Reaching the finish line: how to effectively make her cum with your fingers
- 5 Some more tips
- 6 There’s much more than fingering: learn how to fuck her like she never has been fucked before
So how do you finger her the right way?
Generally, you should never start with fingering straight away. Get your woman horny first and try to build it up.
Start with some foreplay
A nice warm-up will make it a very pleasurable fingering, so play a bit before getting hands-on (in this case, literally).
To get some foreplay ideas, you can check out my posts:
The important thing is to build her arousal before you start.
The Pleasure Keys
First and foremost, it’s important to make sure your woman always feels that it is something you do together, and not something you do for her. So let her see and hear that you’re also enjoying it.
Second, it’s also essential to pay attention to how the woman reacts. Some women prefer and require a very rough type of fingering to feel anything at all. While others are extremely sensitive. So you must be careful when you’re increasing the intensity. Always start out light, and then calibrate according to the reactions you get.
Preparation for a nice finger fuck: what’s important?
Preparation makes perfect, so let’s see a few rules to follow to properly finger fuck your woman.
Clean hands and trimmed nails
You don’t want to finger your woman in the heat of the moment right after having finished a bowl of nachos watching a movie. A woman’s vagina is very sensitive and probably will get itchy or irritated if you just go there with dirty hands. Please, wash your hands!
It is also very important that you have well-trimmed nails. A too long nail can hurt her inside, specially if after a few minutes of fingering you increase speed and one nail brushes her inside.
And that you make sure your fingers don’t have any rough skin that can irritate your woman’s pussy. Do you have calluses on your hands? Smooth them.
Use lube if she needs it
Since some women are more sensitive than others and not all women are dripping wet at all times, it’s a must to have a lubricant at hand.
Most women love the sensation that having lube around their pussy gives them. And if you keep on fingering her for a long time, there’s a risk that her skin will become irritated. A lubricant will minimize this risk.
If you want to get a lube for your nightstand, make sure to check out my section on the best lubes.
The Pleasure Keys
With how many fingers do you start?
Is best to start always with one finger only. The ones that come more handy and give more control are the index or the middle finger.
After a little while, when you feel that the vagina has relaxed and stretched a bit while your girl has build up arousal, you can move to two fingers.
During the finger fuck: what works the best?
Let’s check the stages you will go through when fingering your girl.
The “come here” motion
Every woman is different when it comes to pleasure, but here is a foolproof technique to get your girl to cum using only your hands: the “come here” motion.
As said before, start slowly with one finger (preferably the index or middle finger) and move it inside your woman’s vagina with the nail pointing towards her back. Once you have found the area you want to stimulate, you bend the finger back a bit, as if you are making a come here motion and, at the same time, continue with the fingering, slowly making a bit of in & out movement .
With this movement what your are doing is stimulating the clit, but from inside the vagina.
Continue to repeat this movement and try out different degrees of pressure. Start with light pressure first. But don’t be afraid to build up to hard pressure if your woman enjoys it. You can even move on to using two fingers.
Switch between long and short movements, fast and slow, to see what she likes.
Intensify the feeling with clit stimulation
If your woman appreciates strong pressure, you can intensify the feeling even more by placing your other hand on top of your woman’s pubis. This creates a massage of the same spot from two directions—something some women even may find too intense.
Instead of using the hand, you can also go down and kiss the outside of the pubic bone while pressing into it with your mouth. The most important thing will then be the pressure and not the kisses. Using your mouth creates a hotter experience than if you use your hand.
You can use the come here motion to stimulate all internal areas of the vagina. But the best area to stimulate is the G-Spot and behind it.
Reaching the finish line: how to effectively make her cum with your fingers
Now that you have learned how to finger a woman, it’s time to make her come.
There are two theories about what to do once you notice that your partner starts to react strongly. One says that you should intensify the pressure and speed, to take her into the orgasm. The other says the opposite.
In general: keep the speed
Women usually come when you continue doing the same thing, with the same rythm.
If you think about it, makes sense: they have been building up the pleasure and getting closer to the orgasm with certain type of movement and speed, and changing it will just make them lose it.
Since men often are too goal-oriented and get excited when they notice that the woman is about to come, many men follow the first theory: increasing the speed of their fingering. They do it faster, hoping that the woman will react more powerfully and come.
Because men themselves usually come easier when they increase speed and power, it’s no wonder they think women react in the same way. Often, however, you will change a winning concept this way by increasing rythm and pressure:
- You switch to a movement that the girl doesn’t enjoy as much
- Her feeling gets ruined and she may even ask you to stop
- You don’t get her closer to orgasm but you take her further from it
If you feel your girl is getting more and more excited, you should continue at the same pace without changing anything. The woman will then eventually reach orgasm.
The Pleasure Keys
However, you must actually first find the ultimate pace and pressure for this to work. If you haven’t done that, it’s usually about pressure and not speed. Sometimes, you need to use harder pressure to get your girl over the edge. So intensify the pressure and take her into orgasm.
Some more tips
You know how to finger fuck, but let’s check a couple tips more.
When to use fingering?
Generally, there is no moment better than any other for fingering:
- You may just as well use it during foreplay
- In the middle of fucking
- After you’ve finished fucking
However, keep in mind that variation is important.
Fingering is especially good to use if you are with a woman who is having trouble coming by just getting fucked. Which unfortunately isn’t unusual. Thanks to the better calibration options, you can adjust your technique according to how she reacts and make her cum. Once the woman has learned to come by fingering and is familiar with the feeling and state of mind required, it will be easier for her to learn to come by fucking.
Another advantage of knowing how to finger fuck properly, is that it can easily be carried out at any time and anywhere. So don’t forget, that girls get turned on just as much, if not more than guys, by experimenting with crazy taboo-filled sexual experiences.
Don’t focus too much on fingering, but use it as a complement
Since women, from an outside perspective, often respond more to finger fucking than fucking, it’s easy to get misled and focus too much on fingering. However, it’s crucial that you don’t make fingering a too big part of your repertoire or the sex act.
Despite their intense reaction to fingering, most women prefer the real product. They want to feel the mental closeness and dominance that a cock deep within them creates. Something psychological, that fingering never can replace, regardless of how good you are at fingering or how fast you can finger your partner to orgasm.
In this way, fingering is comparable to dildos and other toys. It stimulates specific areas easily and intensively. Nevertheless, women prefer sex with a real man in front of both sex toys and fingers.
The Pleasure Keys
To understand this, you can reflect on whether you prefer a woman who gives an amazing hand job in front of a woman with who you’re having amazing sex. Even if the analogy isn’t perfect, it makes you see both sides of the coin. Hopefully, you will not get caught in the finger trap despite having learned how to finger properly. And despite having seen your woman’s intense pleasure.
There’s much more than fingering: learn how to fuck her like she never has been fucked before
To learn everything else there is to know about how to finger fuck, including all the best and most intense techniques, as well as all the other skills that will make you fuck her like she never has been fucked before, I recommend you to check out my ultimate guide to become an amazing lover.
We also have a page dedicated to review sex toys and products and also if you have any doubt regarding sex you can send us any sex-related question you may have.
There’s no reason why you shouldn’t become very fucking good in bed.
